The third step – Get to know your obstacles.

@Architsaini

“Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.”
–  Leo Tolstoy

Here you are – at the third step.

You’ve written down what it is that you really want and need in the first step.

You’ve identified the obstacles that you need to overcome in the second step.

Now it’s time to dive in.

Now it’s time to ask some important questions.

Grap that piece of paper with your desires and obstacles on it. Look through all of the internal obstacles marked with an ‘I’ and write down the answer to these three questions for each one:

• • What would my life be like without this obstacle?
    Brainstorm – how would things really change if this obstacle wasn’t there? What does it feel like without this obstacle in the way? How does a life without this obstacle sound to you? This is what you are moving towards by doing this work.

• • What do I lose if I don’t have this obstacle?
    Most of us have obstacles we hold onto without realizing it. They keep us safe, even if they keep us from getting our deepest desires. Be really honest about what it is that you would be giving up if you get rid of this obstacle. Identifying what you gain from your obstacles allows you to catch yourself when things get hard and you start sliding back towards where you are now.

• • How important is getting rid of this obstacle for getting what you want?
    Some obstacles may seem like they rule our lives, but might not actually have much to do with getting what we want. Which of your obstacles are truly in the way of what you wrote down in step one? Which ones are only a little in the way? Which ones are just a pain in the rear that don’t actually get in the way of this goal? Knowing this opens you up to focus on the obstacles that will have the biggest impact. Pick your top internal obstacle to focus on next.

Decide how you want to proceed next

Now is an important time to ask yourself another question – is it time for me to bring somebody else in on this?

The next step is all about coming up with a plan. If you want to waste as little time as possible in this process, now is a good time to recruit some assistance. Whether it is your best friend, your life coach, your mom, or somebody else that you trust – having them work alongside you starting now will save you a bunch of energy compared to bringing them in later.

If you want to go it alone – I won’t fault you for it, but my personal recommendation is to step through some fear at this point and let somebody know that you are working on something really important to you. Then you can take the next step to the life you want.

Additional resources:

• Not sure how you got here? Go back to the First Step.
• Moving past your limitations.